I read this post over at Cafe Bebe, and as I can’t respond on the site nor fit my response in a 140 character tweet, my response is here.
I object to the post. I do not think it represents all women. And I don’t think that’s what all non-celebrity mummy tummies look like. I think what perhaps was supposed to be a post to celebrate woman, actually suggests that those of us who did get back in to our size 10 skinnies, were not up ‘at ridiculous o’clock tending to a newborn baby’ . I was back in mine quickly and I didn’t have ‘personal trainers, nannies, night nurses, medical professionals, chefs and other assorted helpers’. In fact my husband, after his 2 weeks paternity leave was back up to his base in Scotland while I was left lone parenting on the south coast.
So how? I looked after myself during my pregnancy.
I gave up smoking, drinking, late nights and a pretty unhealthy lifestyle. I walked miles most days, even whilst heavily pregnant. I drank gallons of water. I bathed in bio oil, I was addicted to the stuff. I did aqua-aerobics, I ate a lot of fruit and vegetables.
I was determined to get in shape for both myself and the baby. And it worked. After the baby, I was skinnier and more toned than I had been for years. Smaller round the middle than before pregnancy. Of course, I had the squidgy belly, but not a single pregnancy stretch mark.
I was out and about, walking, the day after having Lola – she was content with me in her sling, and continued to do so and that’s what helped me drop the weight. I didn’t talk about needing to do something. I did something. I didn’t have ‘tummies that are worn, tired, scarred and flabby’. Sure my body shape has changed, but no war wounds.
I know I had an easy pregnancy and easy labour. I know that some people cant be active for a whole host of reasons – back backs, illness, weight – and some have to deal with all of that. I know some people have a nightmare during pregnancy and labour, I know c-sections can cause you all sorts of problems, I know some people do have stretch marks. But not everyone.
So instead of judging when you know nothing about what’s really happening in these celebrity worlds, and suggesting they’re not ‘REAL Mummies’, how about actually celebrating all body shapes and hard work? Because I know I am not alone.
And for the record, if I could afford a personal trainer, chef and other assorted helpers I would happily do so? What’s wrong with that?
Pregnancy, labour, life, bodies, minds, skills, we all get different that’s what makes us unique and life interesting, we are all fighting different battles in the war that is life. The sooner people start to accept that and stop bashing the thin for being thin, the fat for being fat, the rich for being rich, the poor for being poor the better. I’m gobsmacked to see yet another mamma bashing post over at Cafe Bebe, guess its easier to lay negativity into others than turn that attention to ones self.
Glad you posted this, Claire – I couldn’t think of a good enough response.
I was back in my jeans a few days after giving birth to my eldest two (yup, size 10 too – gawd, I yearn for those days). My midwife even had a joke with me about my hip bones being on show.
With my third child, I put on twice as much weight as the other two so admittedly I wasn’t back in my jeans quite as soon but I was older and on my third child. I still got back in those jeans within a few weeks though because, as you say, I was active and enjoying the children.
I’m tired of all the celebrity comparisons – it’s like reading the bloody Daily Mail. I was a “real mummy” and proud of it!!
I’m in agreement on this one, I had 2 babies 14 months apart, a really difficult second pregnancy, an emergency csection and i was “lucky” enough to be back to my normal size within days of each birth. Not due to being able to afford personal trainers just simply because I struggle to put on weight whilst pregnant. My body finds it hard work producing babies and as a result I look like a sack of bones by the time the baby is out. It isn’t always about being a celeb, all our bodies cope with prenancy differently and who are we to judge celebrities who may well have similar struggles to me when it comes to being pregnant. I may not have stretch marks or a flabby tummy but I still found being pregnant and having babies bloody hard work!
Me too. I didn’t gain much weight when pregnant and lost it straight after having my daughter. During maternity leave I was the slimmest I have ever been (size 8). This wasn’t due to any ridiculous diet or neglect of my child while I pounded the treadmill, I put it down to not being sat behind a desk for a year and walking everywhere with a very moany baby.
I’m 5’7″ and a size 10. It’s just the way I am. I despise the automatic assumption that slim people must be starving themselves. It’s bad manners, amongst many, many other things.
Thank you.
Enough of this celeb bashing just to make you feel better…
It’s quite simple really, if you are overweight when you get pregnant, then you are going to be overweight post birth. Add a section in there and you have all the excuse you need to sit on your butt and fester.
I had a natural birth followed by three sections and I was back at work and back to life after less than a week following each birth. I had to, I had no choice. I don’t think that makes me a bad mother, I happen to believe that my children are smart, funny, savvy and cool and my work ethic has rubbed off on them.
I had to work really, really hard to get my body back. Just as any woman who sprouts three babies in three years has to do. But I did it because it’s what I wanted to do.
Dare I say that the celeb bashers should STFU and put their time into working out instead of dissing women who have achieved what they can only aspire to?
Cause you know this celeb? You know their life? You know their challenges? You know their problems?
No you don’t. So stop making assumptions.
I linked up 2 of my posts to the original post by Cafe Bebe.
This doesn’t mean I agree with what Karin said, and I hope by me joining in it hasn’t come across that way. I am certainly not a celeb basher even in the slightest.
Look at Kerry Katona and Jade Goody. Both had/have the same tummy as me resulting from pregnancy.
On the other side of the coin, a friend of mine has just given birth to her second child. No saggy tummy, no stretchmarks. Still a “bikini body”. She’s a real mummy.
I don’t care whether ot not celebrities feel they want to wear ‘suck it in pants’ to hide a saggy tummy. How many of us mummies do that when we go for nights out etc. I’m pretty sure a few of us would if we were to stand infront of millions of people on the tv.
At the same time, why should those who spring back into shape not be able to flaunt it and instead feel guilty?
I also would have a personal trainer and chef if I could afford it!
It’s amazing how these topics can create such high emotions… I personally had and still have to work on getting a pre baby body. I am not working out (I hate it) on the other hand I am very much aware of what I eat, not just for weight control but for health and energy too. I have to admit I am tired of reading any bashing, not just celeb bashing. We are not equal when it comes to pregnancy and I have had a wide array of friends who havent recovered the same way. I know one of them looked like pre baby a week after (HOW UNFAIR!!), I certainly didn’t but I am very lucky not to have any stretch mark bar one tiny one whereas my sister who got back in her size 10 shortly after twins had tons and had a tummy tuck. I think I can understand where cafe bebe is coming from. I guess she means this exposure of celebs all glamorous and back at work in an instant put more pressure on mums to be perfect in many ways… I personally get very annoyed when people assume that you shouldnt return to work early. Like you said Sian, some don’t have the choice or just want to go back. it doesn’t make them half mothers!